the point about men and women

On my way home today, I was just thinking about gender issues... don't ask why. Strange topics like that just simply pop into my head...

The farnie thing about men and women today is while equality of the sexes is strongly advocated (I am a firm believer of this!), when it comes to relationship matters, most men and women suddenly revert to Neanderthal beliefs.

Issue #1

Most women still expect men to make the first move.

Woe to the gal who has the guts to go up to the man and ask him out. I am not saying then it is wrong for women to make the first move. In fact, I will applaud the gal who does so. You go, gal! I just simply dun believe in it cos it doesn't work for me personally. I have tried this out and got a rejection right in my face. Therefore, I firmly believe men have to make the first move.

Issue #2

Women expect equal partnership but they still expect pampering.

Frankly, women are probably the most oxymoronic creatures in this world. I'm also speaking for myself! We expect to be taken seriously, our views to be heard etc. However, we do have softer natures where we will and can cry out of sheer frustration at times. This are also the most frustrating moments for men.

Scenario 1 - Gal goes boo hoo hoo over her problems. She expects her man to comfort her. Unfortunately, being male, he simply just doesn't know what to do at moments like this. He just offer her a tissue and hold her, lest he says the wrong thing that can detonate a nuclear bomb. Gal rebutts, "Why can't you say something to comfort me? You're so insensitive!" The innocent guy just 'kena' for keeping quiet.

Scenario 2 - Gal goes boo hoo hoo over her problems. She wails and bitches about her problems. 'Superman to the rescue' will simply run down a list of solutions to solve her problem. Gal wails even more. "All I wanted was for you to comfort me? Couldn't you do that? You're so insensitive!" The poor guy also 'kena' for trying to be Superman.

Why do you think I say women are oxymoronic? Name me another animal who does these things. I can be Wonder Woman at work but when it comes to relationships, I am a 'xiao nu ren'. I need to be pampered. I still expect my guys to pay for dinner, I like my dates to drive, I like men who a good dressers etc.

Not that I am materialistic... paying for dates indicates the guy's interest in you. After all, if he is so stingy on dates, I really can't imagine the kind of boyfriend, husband and father he will be. Paying for dates and taking care of my welfare shows me how good a provider he is. It's a strong point when it comes to marriage.

As for driving... I have little patience with public transport. I take it everyday and it frustrates me. When you are carrying heavy things, bus stops always seem further than they actually are. When you need a cab, they never seem to appear. This is why I am learning how to drive now. I am so getting a car when I get my license. If I have a car and a license, shouldn't my date have one? How romantic is it for me to drive him around... Again, I am not stingy. It's simply a question of taking care of my welfare and providing for me - a strong point when it comes to marriage.

Revelation Moment: This explains why I still single. I have not found a man like that, unlike my 'just married' buddy. Her hubby is the ultimate provider - financially and emotionally. I just haven't had the good fortune of finding a good provider, capable of being a good boyfriend, husband and father. I'm still holding out for the guy for me. I'm done with relationships that don't have any marriage destination. It's simply a waste of time. Until I find the guy, I contented to simply live my life, my way.

It's so strange that I finally got all my thoughts sorted out when I was in Cambodia. Looking at the lives of the people there, it's a reminder that life is just too short to be wasted. I want my life to have value every waking moment. To me, a wasted life is one that had no positive impact on anyone's life... I want to be able to look back on my life, look at the things I've done and be pleased that there was a purpose to my existence in this life.